100 Days Down

Yesterday, I reached a milestone.  One that I had worked toward for 100 days and reaching it makes me extremely happy and also just a little frustrated.  What milestone is it?  Well, yesterday marked the 100th day of consecutive writing that I had logged in The Magic Spreadsheet.

One hundred days was one of the first goals that I had set for myself when I began The Magic Spreadsheet and to be honest, I never really felt like I would reach that goal.  I was absolutely positive that life would get in the way and prevent me from writing one of those days and just as suspected, life did try.  There were long hours at work (over 16 hours a day in some cases), family trips where writing just was not convenient or near the top of the to do list, and then there were the days that I just did not want to write for whatever reason.  Anyone who knows me can attest to the funks I can put myself in.  Through all of these thing though, I persevered and looking forward to the goal, sat down at some point everyday to write.

This perseverance makes me extremely happy with myself.  I now feel that I can do it.  I can write.  That maybe one day I can tell people that I know that I am a writer without that nagging piece inside of me that's wondering what they think about it.  When it comes right down to it though, it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks about it because I write for me.  At the end of the day, The Magic Spreadsheet helped me to do something that I wanted to do, and it doesn't matter what my peers or parents or anyone else for that matter thinks about it.  That sounds harsh though, so I should clarify and say that I have not been discouraged in my goals.  My immediate family understands that I write everyday even though I don't think they really get it.  I just don't feel real comfortable talking about it, and I blame that on being an introvert.

That's where a little of the frustration comes from.  I want to celebrate but then I don't want to celebrate because if I'm celebrating people will want to know why and I'll have to talk about it and I can't talk about it.  Does that make sense?  Probably not, but anyway, I can't help that.  It's really hard to explain.  Maybe I'll celebrate this weekend without telling anyone that I'm celebrating.  That sounds good to me!

There is one other thing that's a little frustrating, but at the same time it's a little encouraging.  It's the fact that now that I've reach 100 days, all that is ahead is more days.  That's both good and bad!  It's good that I know that I can do it, have done it, and can continue to do it, but it's bad in that you never have a day off.  That is probably a good thing too though, because if I took a day off I may not make it back.  So I'll keep plugging away and maybe someday I can write for someone who is not me.

Until then, I'll be right here write 'n stuff!